from bad to worse...

i cannot stand myself anymore..i cannot control myself anymore..the more i tell myself not to,the more i will do it..it is like an illness..an illness tt cannot be cured..in this critical period i m not exercising any self-discipline at all..i wasn't like tt last time..similarly i didn't give myself so much pressure last time..maybe it is like tt..the more u force urself the more u won't do it..i m going mad already..i muz start doing wat i dun like to..i muz go back to my old self..the aim shld be better than tt..but let's start with a more achievable aim first before i fail again n fall into a deeper pit..