shadow

i feel like i m just a shadow in the world, not a real thing existing. no matter how hard i try, no matter tt i have done to my best already, it is still not enough. i still feel so small in front of them. i cannot take stress, tt's for sure. i take my work seriously and want to be thorough in everything i do, but it seems like it just drives me to madness every time. but being thorough is very tiring, and when there's so much things to do, one cannot afford to be thorough. and no one can see how much effort i have spent. i dun really care whether others know how hard i have worked, but i cannot stand being told off for not spending enough effort when i have done my best. maybe my best is just not enough for the world, and my boss.

i hope he can see how i feel, how tired i m, but i guess he will never, cause he is tired himself. only if he knows how hard i have tried.